Anger (Mis) Management

"The world needs anger. The world often continues to allow evil because it isn't angry enough.” Bede Jarrett

Everywhere I go lately, people are angry. When I turn on any reality based TV, like the news or talk show, which is supposed to be reality but often times isn't, I see anger.

When I read a blog or newspaper on-line, and they have a comment section, people either post something nasty or they attack one another. No interesting counter-points or thoughts, just vitriol and hate.

It is getting rather depressing.

My husband even accused me of being "preachy" on my blog. Said I could make people "angry".

Preachy?

"Well", I said in defense, "It is my blog. And no one really reads it anyway. So, who cares." (okay, I was a little angry)

And then I started thinking about what he said. He said I could "make them angry."

But is that true? Can we really "make" someone angry? Is all this anger out there really caused by a person? Or a thing? Or is it just some unmet expectation deep inside each of us. And is it also a lack of true compassion or understanding for one another.

There is a book that I love, written by a wonderful writer who understood pain. The book is Hearts That We Broke Long Ago written by Merle Shain.

She writes, "Compassion cannot exist with anger or jealousy, with envy or revenge, so those who have those feelings starve themselves. In the hands of the insecure, compassion becomes condescension, competitiveness, pity and a taste for pain. Real compassion comes from strength."

What she says is so right on. We have lost all ability to be compassionate with one another. We are so busy with our own busyness that we forget we are all on this journey together. We are so focused on trying to one-up each other or prove that someone else is wrong that we never just sit back and take a moment to understand one another. We never look for ways to work together to solve our differences. We just yell and scream and say the wrong things (think Rahm Emanuel).

They say that there is a 'revolution' underfoot. A new movement. But I don't think that it is such a new movement as much as it is a return to some sense of normalcy. Some common courtesy. When the Tea Party folks talk about returning to a "God fearing nation" it seems to me that they are looking to return to some common decency. Where polite conversation is considered the norm, not all of this hate and vitriol.

So, anyway, I guess we could all try to be a little nicer to one other. That could help. I don't think that we have the power to make each other angry; I think that we are all just trying to be heard and we are growing louder with our own discontent.

All I know for sure is that we are all so divided. And in that division we really don't even have any common ground among our splintered selves. We are more isolated than ever. Needier. More fearful.

Maybe a better question to ask is not why we are angry, but is the anger really working. And if it is, which is doubtful, where exactly is it leading us to? And why? And is it a place where we really, really want to be.